FINDING HOPE

Dear Finding Hope, I met Chad about six months ago through a friend and we have been dating every since. It  has been going really great.  I don't know too much about his past, but I do know he dated a girl before me for about two years. She broke up with him but didn't really give a reason except she lives about two hours away from our town and she didn't like the distance and neither wanted to move. That's all I know. Anyway, last night he told me that she called and was going to be in town this weekend and wanted to meet him for dinner. He asked if I would mind. Well, yes, actually I do. But I don't want to look jealous or clingy. I don't know what her deal is and I'm hurt that he wants to go. What should I do?  Signed,  I Said He Could Go, But Not Happy Dear Not Happy That is a tough one for sure. It can be very frustrating not knowing what her goal is, especially since they dated for two years and you are not truly clear on what went d

Dear Finding Hope I have been dating 'Ben' for about five months. Things are going great! Really! We are both divorced and what you would call a SIM. (Single In Mid-Life). Ben never had any children. I have one son who is in college. So here's the thing. My lease runs out at the end of this month. Ben has asked me if I would like to move in with him. I'm super nervous, but I think I really want to. We both have jobs so I don't feel like I would be taking advantage of him. Plus, if we pool our money, we will have extra to do some things and go places we have been talking about. I know we need some sort of agreement, but it just feels right. I'm curious as to what you think.  Sincerely Ready To Pack!! Dear Ready To Pack! First, let me say that I'm very happy you have found someone you enjoy spending time with. You didn't give me a whole lot of information, but in this instance, that might be just as well because I'm going a little old schoo

I decided, at the first of the year, that I wanted to share stories of people who inspire me.  Inspiration comes in all shapes and forms and all the people I wish to highlight have impacted me in some manner. They each offer a Slice Of Hope into my oftentimes crazy world, and my hope is by introducing them, I will share that slice with you; My Hopefuls. My first person, is really two persons; sisters to be exact. Shelley and Kelley. No, they are not twins, and in fact, they would probably be the first to say they are quite different on many levels. The one thing they do share however, is their dedication to family and their belief in determination and hard work to accomplish their goals. Shelley is the older of the two; a little shy, kept more to herself but always watching and listening. She married a great guy, had a son and then a daughter and life was beautiful. It wasn’t perfect, but it was beautiful. She was a stay at home mom and devoted her life to her family. S

Dear Finding Hope I have a question about my relationship with my best friend “Amy”. I’ve known Amy for several years and met at work while we were both married. I divorced about three years ago and she was very supportive of me during that time. About seven months ago she told me that her and her husband had decided on a trial separation. I knew things weren’t great, but didn’t realize it had come to that. Anyway, he moved out, and well, to be quite honest, she went a little wild. Having only known her as a married women, I was not prepared for her new ‘lifestyle’. Hope, she wants to go out several times a week, and does not seem to know when to go home. Which I guess is her right, but she always asks me to go. She knows I’m single too and she wants company (and sometimes a designated driver). I don’t want to sound like a prude; I have fun when I’m with her. She’s lively and flirtatious with never a dull moment; but I’m really not into that scene and I’m getting a little

Dear Finding Hope I am a 51 year old woman who has been divorced for 2 years. My husband and I divorced after 19 years of marriage. There wasn’t any cheating or abuse, we just grew apart and after our daughter graduated high school we decided to go our separate ways and try to find happiness again. Overall I have done great. I have a cute little apartment, friends and I’ve started taking pottery classes. I even met a guy online; but this is where it gets tricky. I really like him, but he and my daughter do not get along at all. To be honest, my daughter started it by being so resistant to his involvement in anything. She does attend college away, but comes home often. Once I knew that he and I could actually be something, I introduced him to her. She immediately put up a wall. She has no interest in getting to know him or doing anything with us when she is home. He has come to resent the trouble and stress she is causing me. Is this normal? What should I do? I don’t want

Dear Finding Hope I was married for 8 years and 2 weeks before Christmas my husband moved out. I knew things were not great, but I never thought he would walk out, especially during the holidays. He said that he doesn't love me anymore and doesn't want to live a lie. That life is too short to be with someone he doesn't love. With the help of family and friends, I managed to make it through Christmas, but now the truth is sinking in and with all the talk about the new year, I'm really struggling with how to handle my new reality. What do you think I should do?  Not A Happy New Year Dear Not A Happy New Year First, let me say that I'm so very sorry for what happened to you and it is hard to understand why your husband picked this particular time to leave. It is true that the holiday season can put tremendous stress and strain on couples and individuals. Without knowing any of your back story, it's hard to know the true reason why he left, but here are